Faster than a Frozen Pizza Green Curry

Approximately three times a week, at about 6pm, I can be heard asking anyone standing within earshot, “Should we have Green Curry tonight?”

So sick have my family become of this question, that now treat it as rhetorical.

Tonight I had Green Curry.

It should be noted that the vocal portion of the family were gone. That left Charlie and myself as a voters. And he is mere putty in my hands, the poor boy. He actually seems to want to please me!

Maybe it’s the headphones clasped to head, with guns roaring in the background as he plays Call of Duty Modern Warfare (don’t worry, he has the “blood turned off”, whatever that means) as I asked him his preference between frozen pizza and Green Curry. Maybe it is his sweet nature. It really doesn’t matter. He let me decide.

I ate way too much and now I feel sick, sitting in bed with the place all to myself. Books and magazines spread out across the entire surface…

But that’s not the point.

The point is, this is, by far, the fastest meal in my repertoire. Even if I start with frozen chicken. It is also one of my most favorite meals. I. Love. Green. Curry. Anything.

Maybe the delicious nature of green curry is responsible for cultures that eat dogs? I really swear you could put anything into the silky green liquid and it would taste like heaven.

I digress. And not in a good way.

I have long drooled over tempting recipes with long ingredient lists patiently pounded out with a mortar and pestle, ending in a curry paste that promises to be the best I’ve ever tasted.

And yet, I’ve never settled down to make one from scratch. I keep meaning to. It sounds fun. but…

WHY SHOULD I, WHEN THIS HEAVEN-IN-A-CAN EXISTS?

Honestly. I love it. Everything is already in there: kaffir lime leaves, lemongrass, bamboo shoots, coconut milk…

Before my friend Beth (who used to live in Thailand, I might add) turned me on to this brand, I used to nurse along a kaffir lime plant and a lemongrass catastrophe-in-a-pot so I could make a decent curry from the Thai Kitchen brand green curry paste available in grocery stores and I would never be without my favorite meal. It was really good. But it was a giant pain in the ass.

I’m exaggerating: it wasn’t really all that huge of a pain in the ass; only when compared to the curry in a can that I use now.

Here are the steps to making it:

• about 20 minutes before we need to eat, I run downstairs, grab some chicken thighs or chicken breasts from freezer.
• I submerge frozen chicken package in warm water. I don’t defrost in the microwave anymore because I got sick of partially cooked corners and I think it changes the texture of the meat.
• I rifle around for any (and I mean any) languishing vegetables to toss in: peas pods(or frozen peas), tomatoes, zucchini, green beans, potatoes, eggplant, carrots… anything.

• I cut chicken into large bites, discarding any globs of fat from the thighs (which I like better than breasts for this)
• If feeling dandy and I have the time, I brown the chicken before dumping in the can of curry. It’s not necessary, but does prevent weird chicken dust from forming in broth. I can’t think of any other way to describe that stuff that floats in the sauce. If done right, it also creates brown bits that I scrape up when I add the curry, which adds some extra flavor.

• I simmer until chicken is cooked thru, adding veggies in last minutes.

• And finally, I serve it over jasmine rice

Tonight, starting with frozen chicken thighs, I had dinner on the table in 15 minutes. The thighs took 5 minutes to thaw. The curry took 10 minutes to cook. And the rice was ready in 15.

I ate two full bowls and then ate the rest of Charlie’s. And then ate a bunch more as I put the leftovers away.

Send help.

[update: it is now lunch. I am over my sickness and preparing to eat the rest for lunch in 44 minutes.]