Jenmenke

Road Warrior

worms

It Smells Like Worms

It’s raining (again). It’s been raining for day upon endless day in Minnesota. Well, except for last weekend. We had a nice weekend.

Before today I was at 6+ inches for the month. I emptied about 1″ out of my rain gauge this morning and there is no end in sight

So, is it my imagination, or can I really smell the worms? Even when I walk outside, there is this humid wormlike smell to the air. I swear to Heaven above that I am accurate in my olfactory. It is the worms I smell.

To further prove my point, I have driven my car two times today. I try to avoid the thousands of outstretched bodies on the road. I swerve like a maniac trying to avoid their helplessness, all the while thinking of that movie where Brad Pitt is in some Buddhist village trying to build a shrine (or something) and the workers can’t do the work because they can’t kill any worms.

What in Buddha’s name would a Buddhist do on a day like today? Driving in a car? Driving over thousands of worms?

It would truly be a moral dilemma.

After all, it’s a dilemma even for me. And I’m just a gardener.

And then I park my car in my garage and go inside.

Then I go back in my garage to get in my car and I almost keel over. It’s that same smell as outside, only ten times stronger:

Worms!

And I imagine I am smelling all the worm guts in the tire treads and thrown up on the undercarriage and spewn all over the exterior of the car. (I know that’s gross, but it makes sense, doesn’t it?)

It’s worms I smell.

The Great Broccoli Lie

chopped broccoliThere is a lie that gets told every year in the Menke home right about now. It goes something like this:

“Hey guys, this is our first broccoli from the garden this year.” (Jennie)

“Really? I thought you weren’t going to grow broccoli anymore.” (any one except Jennie)

“Yeah, I know. But I was at Shady Acres and it looked good, so I bought some. I got it in early, so the Cabbage Moths weren’t a problem.” (Jennie)

“Really? Are you sure? (Family member A)

“You are positive there aren’t any worms?” (Family member B)

“Have you seen any moths? Do the leaves have any holes? Are you sure?” (Family member C)

“I am positive there are no worms. I promise.” (Jennie – THE GREAT LIE.)

BT is a very good (and organic) control for cabbage worms. The problem is, you have to go into the barn, find it, mix it, spray the plants and repeat at least once a week during the growing season. I simply can’t be counted on to do that.

cabbage moth on kale

Oh, what’s that you say? I should just pick the worms off? Sure. No problem. Here is what my family sees when they sit down to some perfectly steamed broccoli:

wormy broccoliAnd this is what I see, right after telling the Great Lie:

cabbage worm!Of course, this second photo has been enhanced, for your viewing pleasure. It is what I see. My family, most notably, does not see the worm, even though it is there. Scroll back up and look for yourself.

I have two choices at this point.

1) I can fess up and tell them that I lied. That I really did see moths, and holes on the leaves and even saw a worm before steaming, but was positive they were gone until right this very minute when I saw it on my plate.

Or, 2) I can keep my mouth shut, eat the worm and pretend nothing untoward is happening.

What would you do? (comment please).

Well, as I’m sure you all know by now, I ate the worm. Admitting I was wrong would have been way harder.